The other day I was talking with another mother about life and our kids. We were sharing our stories and catching up after not seeing each other for a couple of weeks, knowing that we were each wrestling with something in the meantime.
We rehashed what we already knew; new baby, health problems, lack of sleep, teething, work, etc... All things mommy’s deal with. The conversation culminated into our shared feeling of exhaustion; that this season of our lives is taking a toll, but one that we are absolutely willing to pay.
We shared how messy our houses are, how dragging the kids out shopping can be a nightmare, that friends often complain that we aren’t present, that others may look in on our lives and see chaos-expecting so much more from us.
Then she says something that I have been thinking and silently defending myself with for the better part of 5 years...”I’m sorry, but it’s about the bare essentials right now.”
I was so happy to hear those words come from someone else's mouth. I often feel lonely in those feelings of inadequacy. I think to myself "I should be doing more." I feel like others think I am not pulling my weight. Why do I let what others expect of me even enter into my thoughts?
Sometimes, life takes a sharp curve and you are left feeling off balance. You have to get your bearings again. You operate in survival mode until you feel like you can take back the reins.
I have felt like that after each child, a little less each time, but nevertheless, life goes topsy-turvy when the family has to acclimate to a new member. A new job, a major illness, whatever the reason...sometimes you can only accomplish the bare essentials.
Are we all health, happy and safe?
Do we have food to eat?
Do we have clean clothes to wear?
Then we are OK.
Live in that moment. Get through it, enjoy it, whatever needs to be done.
For others out there living in survival mode, you are not alone. Not in the least. We all do it at some point and we all get through it.
My motto in times like this: And this too shall pass
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